As “The Big Day” creeps steadily closer, I find that I am losing sleep.
Not because of the normal discomforts of pregnancy, those are actually becoming less and less of a problem, as long as I see my wizard of a chiropractor once a week. (I will FOREVER recommend finding a good chiropractor early on, I have been going to mine for years) But because my mind is racing over all of the decisions that Cris and I have made regarding the birth, and what we’d like to have go down on that day. Which I’m pretty sure is normal for new moms as well. Cris seems to be taking it all in stride, and it really helps me see him remain so calm.
Also I’m pretty sure the whole “plan” will go out the window as soon I go into active labor.
While we feel we are pretty ready at the house, I keep coming up with more to be done. Poor Cris is doing his best to get to everything on my honey-do list without complaint, but between the heat and grueling physical days at his work; he’s just as tired as I am. The important things are ready though, and the baby’s room is FINALLY clean, and no longer a storage room/ man cave area (cave-man area?) We have the diapers and wipes set up in what may or may not be an optimal situation, have moved all the baby shower gifts into the room, and cleaned all the bedding and clothes. I’m packed for the hospital and so is the baby.
And yes, I am totally aware that I am overthinking EVERYTHING and I’m sure that we don’t need or won’t use half of what we have but I can’t seem to stop myself. It’s incredibly frustrating to have so little energy at this point. Talk about nesting in the extreme…
We are trying to plan for all contingencies, since we understand that when things start to happen, changes and decisions will need to be made very quickly, and we are trying to teach our selves to be as flexible as possible. This is especially difficult for both of us, as we are both bull-headed control freaks, and like to be as informed as possible at every angle. We have been known to take MONTHS to make simple decisions… like what kind of ground tent to purchase, or what kind of camp stove to buy.
So you see why this all weighs pretty heavily on me at three weeks out. It eases my anxiety to know that we are on the same page about everything, and at this point it’s just getting our baby friendly hospital to understand what we’d like, and making sure Cris knows what to watch for, since I have been told that I will be in no condition to think too hard or make big decisions. We don’t THINK we are being picky, and we have a lot of confidence in our chosen Dr.s, but because this is our fist time, we really feel a bit clueless. We did do a checklist style birth plan, but we know it probably wont get stuck to, and we have come to terms with that.
This whole experience has been so incredibly humbling as friends and family have gone completely out of their way to make things as easy on us as they possibly can. I knew we were loved before, but seeing how much everyone wants to help and be involved is on a whole different level. Its truly amazing how much people want to help.
It has been so fun and enlightening getting to know Cris as a new dad, and it makes me so much more confident in our relationship as parents AND husband and wife. We seem to be on the same page before even discussing the issues, and I have been trying to include him at every aspect, because I understand that new daddy’s may not feel as involved because they don’t actually carry the baby, until it’s born. I know that even though my questions sometimes seem silly or redundant, he appreciates that I’m involving him as much as I can. He has been incredibly strong and supportive throughout my whole pregnancy, and the next few months promise to be entertaining, at the very least .